16 (Catullus)

Put under a cut for obscenity. Catullus was very...effective with his invective.

Pedicabo ego vos et irrumabo,
Aureli pathice et cinaede Furi,
qui me ex versiculis meis putastis,
quod sunt molliculi, parum pudicum.
Nam castum esse decet pium poetam
ipsum, versiculos nihil necesse est;
qui tum denique habent salem ac leporem,
si sunt molliculi ac parum pudici,
et quod pruriat incitare possunt,
non dico pueris, sed his pilosis
qui duros nequeunt movere lumbos.
Vos, quod milia multa basiorum
legistis, male me marem putatis?
Pedicabo ego vos et irrumabo.

I’ll plow your asses and I'll fuck your mouths,
you cunt, Aurelius, and you man-whore, Furius;
you thought, because my verses are so tender,
that I’m a pussy with no sense of shame?
Good poets should be moral people, yes,
but in their verses morals aren’t required.
In fact, their poems have more wit and charm
if they are tender and a little shameless,
and if they make their readers hot and bothered--
I don’t mean kids, but these old hairy men
who just can’t seem to get hard any more.
You two, because you’ve read my “thousand kisses,”
you think that I’m some kind of sissy-boy?
I’ll plow your asses and I'll fuck your mouths.